This is bad time of year for record releases. In the next week or two, we’ll start getting all the good stuff that they want to sneak in before the September 3oth Grammy deadline, and then it’ll be the run-up to Christmas. In the meantime, somebody needs to make fun of the records that got dumped on the market in the summer while nobody was looking. A few of these are really rather good. The others? Not so much.

David Garrett

He had made some bad decisions in life, but he understood now that this was something he had to do.

Peter Oundjian

It would be their private joke. Nobody would guess what he was really doing.

André Rieu

He was dying on the inside.

Kissin plays Mozart

He’d found it surprisingly difficult to adjust to life above ground.

Fröst & Friends

In retrospect, the photo shoot’s Titanic theme would have worked much better if they’d had the budget for a boat.

Galliano plays Bach

People didn’t take him seriously as an interpreter of Bach’s music. He was convinced this had something to do with his famously effervescent demeanor.

Timo Korhonen plays Bach

He desperately wanted to be respected as an artist, but he was prepared to use his looks to get there if that’s what it took.

Paul Lewis plays the Beethoven Concertos

He should never have told told him how he felt. There was no putting that genie back in the bottle.

Alondra de la Parra

They hadn’t actually photoshopped in a sombrero, a taco truck or a home depot parking lot, so that was something, she supposed.

jaroussky Motets

He had made a record that was luscious, pristine, and edited to an unattainable level of perfection. They had pretty much done the same with his eyebrows.



Post a comment
  1. August 12, 2010

    I’m really, really tempted to bring home that Philippe Jaroussky. I’ll bet his CD is good, too.

    • properdiscord #
      August 12, 2010

      This is a sophisticated classical music blog, and not at all the place for this sort of crude, smutty innuendo. _smirk_

      • August 12, 2010

        You have no idea how incredibly wrong the first draft of my comment was.

  2. ImproperMiscreant #
    August 12, 2010

    If politics is “showbiz for the ugly”, what’s classical music marketing?

    That said, I think David Garrett (no relation to Leif) is really the lead singer for Steel Panther.

    Funny post–thanks PD.

  3. Anonymous #
    August 14, 2010

    It’s wrong that some people out there are buying CDs of the likes of David Garrett and Andre Rieu!

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